The Theory of Five 2 ‘S

The Theory of Five 2’s

I often joke around and say things that can easily be brushed off as being facetious,whimsical or down right stupid. It’s in my nature as an entertainer and part of my mantra as an MC. This is a trait most of the men on my moms side of the family have in common. We are all very light hearted at our core when it comes to being humorous. When I was young my older cousin Marvin said something in jest that managed to stick with me throughout the years however it wasn’t until recently that I truly begin to understand the genius in the logic he applied and how it could benefit others in life. I present to you the theory of five 2’s. Marvin use to say if you can’t get you a 10 get you 5 2’s or any other variation of numbers needed to equal the desired amount. The desired amount being the mythical dime or immaculate woman all men are seeking. Now the definition of a dime is relative not absolute so I won’t waste time trying to define what a dime is to me because the next man (or woman) will most likely have their own standards which form the perfect companion they desire. What I will do is elaborate on the theory in an attempt to shed light on the concept so each one of you can apply it. The theory of 5 2’s is not a new concept at all. In fact women have understood this for years and have disguised it under very deceptive verbiage. Older women in particular have mastered the art of having a man for every perceived want or need in their life. A woman may have one man whose sole purpose is companionship. Not necessarily sex either. This person could be a confidant, a friend who listens to her when she has a load on her mind. This same woman may also have a man who provides stability or financial relief for her aka the sugar daddy. This man may not be her cup of tea romantically but he keeps the bills paid so therefore he is crucial to her standard of living being maintained. Next she may have a man who is handy around the house aka Mr. Fix it. He is her personal handy man. He keeps her car running and takes care of maintenance her home may require from time to time. He may or may not ever get the pussy but he is damn sure gonna stick around long enough to see where this road ends. The last man she is going to have in her life is the lover aka Mr. Yeah. This is the brother who comes around and puts it down. He gonna beat it up every chance he gets. He may have short comings like unemployment, already married or domestic abuse tendencies but his ability to hit that reset button on command will always keep him in high demand. Now together all these men form Voltron or her perfect man and rest assured she will keep all these men in her life until that fortunate day comes that she finds a man who is willing to fill all the roles.

Now men on the other hand are much simpler creatures with much simpler needs. We have the reputation of being free spirits and are outnumbered by women so we have way more options at times. At the core all men want a lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets but we also want a mother, a caregiver and a ride or die partner. Hence the need for 5 2’s. The first 2 may be beautiful on the outside but has some serious personality quirks. She might talk way to much, be stuck up or just too prude to suck a dick in the back seat. We are aesthetically pleased with her but are still forced to roam. The second 2 might be the freak we desire. She is the one that pulls your dick out your pants just cuz she wants to suck it. She’s down for whatever. She will let you have it any time any place and as long as she makes you feel like that pussy is yours and only yours she’s going to always have a spot on the roster. The next 2 is the mother figure. This bitch knows how to get shit done but at times over steps her boundaries. She’s clutch and reliable but unfortunately reminds you way too much of your mother at times. The next 2 is awesome with the kids. She can run a house smoother than astro glide on a dildo. She seems to effortlessly juggle activities we often take for granted. She’s the perfect housewife. The only problem is that she’s usually broke lol. She is a liability at times. If your money is right then it’s smooth sailing but should you need her to ever transition into a go getter you are shit out of luck. The last 2 is the ride or die chick. She can roll blunts, weigh up weed, shank a nigga if need be. She’s your dream girl at 18 and your worst nightmare at 40. Sometimes she’s too hood for her own good but as long as she’s willing to settle for red lobster as a fancy restaurant then it’s smooth sailing. Add them all together and you got you the dime we all are searching for it’s just your job to make sure these women never meet.


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